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| My Toddler
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Potty Perfect
Time to ditch the diapers? We share some toilet-training secrets.
By Christina Ching and Julia Goh
Make sure that your child is mentally ready, meaning that she is willing to use the potty. If she is not bothered by a wet or dirty diaper, or is uninterested or reluctant to sit on the potty, then you are not going to get very far.
If you're incredibly busy at work, moving house or expecting a new baby soon, it's okay to wait a few months to let things settle down.
Get your tot to help pick one that she likes, or she may resist using it, and that's the last thing you need!
Assure your child that you are there for her, and when accidents happen, don’t make a big deal out of them. Simply clean up and tell her that you know she's trying. |
Your toddler’s sleeping through the night, eating well, and growing strong. There’s just one big milestone left — potty-training. Most toddlers show signs that they are ready to be toilet-trained when they are between 18 months and 3 years. But it’s more helpful to consider your child's readiness, rather than going by mere numbers alone.
READY TO GO?
A child needs to achieve a certain amount of bladder readiness before she can be toilet-trained - some toddlers start showing signs at around 2, but most are ready by the time they turn 3. When you notice that your toddler is dry at longer intervals, such as after a nap or for at least two hours - implying that her maturing bladder can hold larger amounts of urine - this indicates that her body is ready for toilet-training. She should also be physically ready, including the ability to walk well (to and from the bathroom), to pull her pants up and down, and to get on and off the potty fairly independently.
Most importantly, make sure that your child is mentally ready, meaning that she is willing to use the potty. You won’t get very far if she is not bothered by a wet or dirty diaper, or is uninterested or reluctant to sit on the potty. After all, you can put a toddler on a potty, but you can't make her pee!
Once your child shows signs of readiness, most experts recommend waiting at least three months before you start proper toilet-training. Use this time to set the stage for success — let her observe you or an older sibling using the toilet, introduce books or videos on the subject, and talk to her about her going on the potty.
Above all, if you’re aiming for a stress-free, successful outcome, both you and your little one must be ready for this huge step. Know that while some kids can be toilet-trained easily, it's a long-drawn battle for others. So, if you're incredibly busy at work, moving house or expecting a new baby soon, it's okay to wait a few months to let things settle down. As this is a huge milestone for your child, it's well worth the wait.
SET THE STAGE
If it’s all systems go for your tot, introduce the idea of using a potty. Watch videos and read bedtime stories about the subject, and discuss using the toilet. You’ll have a higher chance of succeeding the more your child understands.
Let your little learner watch you or other family members using the toilet, and tell her that she can do the same thing when she's ready. If she has a little friend of the same age who’s already using the toilet, mention it - there’s nothing like some peer pressure to move things along!
If you notice that she is peeing or pooping, draw her attention to it, such as by saying, “Are you peeing?” Then follow with something positive, like “Next time, we can try peeing in the potty if you like.” Using phrases like “when you are ready” let your child know that the choice is hers and she isn’t under any pressure to start.
This is a good time to buy the potty - get your tot to help pick one that she likes, or she may resist using it, and that's the last thing you need! Make sure the seat is sturdy - if your little one doesn't feel secure on it, she may not feel comfortable enough to pee or poop in it. Try letting her decorate her new potty with stickers and help her get used to it by allowing her to sit on it with her clothes on to watch TV or to read.
Drum up the excitement further by buying some “big girl” undies together. Be mindful, however, that some children may find toilet-training discouraging or humiliating if they have too many accidents in their underwear. So, it is a good idea for your tot to have some “successes”, either in diapers or pull-ups, before you let her use any underwear.
SITTING ON THE THRONE
Once you introduce junior to potty-training, she’ll like to emulate family members by sitting on her potty while they use the toilet. She will also make some associations between peeing/pooping and using the potty.
Start watching your child's body signals closely. Most children will have a tell-tale stance, facial expression, or routine (eg running to another room) when they have a bowel movement. When you notice this, say, “Shall we go sit on the potty?”, then take her there if she's willing.
Recognising when your child urinates is a bit harder. Give her plenty of fluids before you take her to the potty every 30 minutes to maximise your chances of success. Help her to recognise the connection between a full bladder and peeing. Don’t force her, instead, let her stay seated for a few minutes at a time and be prepared to delay training if she shows resistance. This is also a good time to teach good hygiene, such as wiping and washing hands after using the potty.
THE SWEET SMELL OF SUCCESS
Toilet-training is a huge process — some experts feel that it is the biggest developmental step your child will take. While some kids breeze through it in a matter of weeks, others take several months. Patience is key. Don't be discouraged if you have a few good days, followed by several bad ones. And avoid pushing too hard, or your child may end up resisting and suffering more accidents. It's okay to take a few days or even weeks “off” — your child will relax gradually if she reckons that the power struggle is over.
It’s hard to admit, but toilet-training is truly in your toddler’s control. All you can do is to support and encourage your little one, and set the stage for
success. Always keep in mind that your child will be toilet-trained when she is ready. So stress less and enjoy the ride!
If you have any comments or practical suggestions, write to us at editor@family.sg
- Mother & Baby
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