Text Michelle Ha

The below interview first appeared in the January 2006 issue of Mother & Baby. In the lead up to Evelyn Tan and Darren Lim's upcoming show on Channel 8, premiering at the end of August, we are re-publishing the interview for our family.sg readers. 

Eloquent, down-to-earth and brainy Evelyn Tan, didn't exactly take to motherhood like fish to water. Like any first-time mum, the former Channel U Mandarin news anchor grappled with a host of bewildering experiences, like breastfeeding and baby Kristen's night waking. She's married to 32-year-old actor Darren Lim.

One year on, Evelyn declares motherhood to be a roller-coaster ride, filled with new discoveries. Here's what Evelyn has to say about being a mother to her baby Kristen.

Mother & Baby: Has motherhood been an adventure for you?
Oh yes definitely! It’s been an exciting one, sometimes like a roller coaster ride. There will be ups and downs. Ups can be anything from a simple smile to a developmental milestone, first witnessed by me. When downs happen, I remind myself that no mum is a natural. We learn as we go along.

What is your philosophy of mothering?
I believe in talking to her often and explaining things to her. I also believe in breastfeeding, so I've been her 'milk bottle' since she was born. I intend to do that till she's one. 

Some moms say their breast is their baby's pacifier. What do you call yours?
Goodness no!  Mine are purely for providing food. That's why they have pacifiers, anyway. Otherwise, my breasts would be so sore!

Do you have any particular mommy-paranoia?
I was obsessed with everything. But the worst is this: I was so worried baby wasn't getting enough, so I got a stopwatch to time her feeds. Each time she fell asleep at my breast, I'd stop my stopwatch and wake her up. When she started suckling again, I would let the stopwatch run again.  And you know how it is with day-old babies? They start and stop so many times.  I was really busy keeping her awake and meddling with the stop watch at the same time! 

So how do you keep yourself from going crazy from the stresses of motherhood?
What do you mean? I'm still stressed up!  No lah, just kidding. It's important to relax and spend time away from your child, but the only way I could have peace of mind when I’m away from her, is to find someone I totally trust to take care of her—that's where doting grandparents come into the picture.

Who do you think she takes after: you or daddy?
Increasingly, people have been telling me she looks like her dad. She used to resemble me. I think that goes for her personality too.  She has her father's stubbornness. I'd like to think her air of contemplative demeanor is from me. I'm the cautious type. I think before I leap.

Is there any trait you hope that she would not inherit from you or your husband?
Our temper!

What are you doing now, besides being mom and wife?
I’m presently freelancing in the entertainment industry, one of which is hosting for Tab TV for Mediacorp. Other times, I’m a stay-home mum.
  

What are some of your plans you have for yourself?
I'm planning to do a graduate diploma in early childhood education, to launch into a new career in this field.

So what's your first report card like?
There are good days and bad days. Some days I feel like I can win an award, and on other days, I don't even think I deserve to be a mother. But I totally agree that motherhood pushes your limits and challenges you to be a better person that you were before. So far, I have been pleasantly surprised with the changes I've seen in myself, some were changes I never expected, like my patience.

Do you think this adventure will ever end?
Nope, but fortunately, I think it's going to get better and easier…with the second, third and fourth one. I believe that at every stage of a child's life, there will be new challenges and new learning opportunities for a parent, but since it’s so exciting and enjoyable, I’m not complaining!