Help your little one safely navigate the Internet

By Jenny Ng 

With junior logging on to the Internet when he’s barely out of his diapers, parents need to wise up to the dangers lurking in cyberspace. Mother & Baby fills you in on how to help your little one safely navigate the information superhighway.

It is good for parents to play and explore any new game together with their children. If you are unfamiliar with the game, get your kids to teach you.   Instil safe computer practices when your children are young. Besides teaching junior to use the computer in a responsible manner, stress the importance of observing daily routines and fulfilling other obligations, such as completing household chores and homework.  If discipline and rapport are instilled early, there will be less of a worry when the computer at home is banned, especially when you consider that computer usage or web surfing are often not limited to the home as children may surf at friends’ place, school or pay-for-use Internet services.

In this networked age, Net-savvy preschoolers are not just familiar with Google searches, they are playing games online as soon as they figure out how to work the arrow keys on the keyboard. By the time kids enter Primary 1, they are expected to complete e-learning tasks and use the computer for projects. 

Yet, a recent survey of 400 Singaporeans showed that many parents are ignorant of their children’s cyber activities. According to the Norton Online Family Survey, while parents thought that their kids were online for just 10 hours a week, although the figure given by children was nearly double, an average of 18 hours a week. Another report, by the International Telecommunication Union (ITU), showed that parents are unaware of risks that their kids are exposed to when online. 

WIDESPREAD USE
While there is currently no official research on the level of Internet usage among kids in Singapore, experts Mother & Baby spoke note that the increase is apparent. Dr Clarice Hong, a Raffles Hospital specialist (Psychiatry), notes, “If one is to consider gadgets like mobile phones that are Wi-Fi enabled, one can see how rampant the use (of Internet) is.” 

Echoing her views, Dr Ong Say How, a consultant and deputy chief (Department of Child & Adolescent Psychiatry) at the Institute of Mental Health, points out that he has been seeing more computer-related problems in children and teens compared to a decade ago, when he hardly saw such cases.  

Figures from the Infocomm Development Authority of Singapore show that Singapore households who have Internet access rose from 65 per cent to 76 per cent between 2003 and 2008, a jump of more than 15 per cent. In 2007, the report notes that some 90 per cent of kids aged 7 to 14 years had used the Internet in the past 12 months. 

TO SURF AND PROTECT
With Internet access so common and the limitations of filtering software like Net Nanny, you need to ensure that your children’s safety in cyberspace is not compromised. Dr Ong advises parents to instil safe computer practices when their children are young. 

Besides teaching junior to use the computer in a responsible manner, stress the importance of observing daily routines and fulfilling other obligations, such as completing household chores and homework. Since you can’t expect to supervise adequately unless you know what to look out for on the screen, you’ll need to be computer savvy and become familiar with computer jargon. Finally, as parents, you must lead by example. 

Dr Ong explains, “If a child sees his father surfing the Internet for hours on end, he would probably think it is acceptable. You can install safety networks and programs into the computer as a safeguard but they are not totally foolproof. They cannot block every single undesirable website.” 

THE RIGHT START
Dr Hong stresses that parents should take the lead in safeguarding their children’s safety when they are on the Internet. Given that children mature differently, the experts agree that there is no one magical age that parents should start educating their kids. 

Poh Yeang Cherng, manager at TOUCH Cyber Wellness & Sports, advises that you can start as soon as your child has the ability to understand the dangers of cyberspace and when kids start becoming familiar with or curious about the Internet. 

Dr Hong suggests that you be upfront with your children about what sites are permitted and the amount of time they can spend online. She notes, “If discipline and rapport are instilled early, there will be less of a worry when the computer at home is banned, especially when you consider that computer usage or web surfing are often not limited to the home as children may surf at friends’ place, school or pay-for-use Internet services.” 

Dr Ong adds that parents need to find opportunities to openly discuss computer usage and responsible gaming with their children. Share an anecdote or highlight something they have read or heard about. 

He stresses, “Parents must not shy away from topics, since a lack of information would drive children to seek the information elsewhere and they might end up with lots of misinformation.”  

SETTING BOUNDARIES
There aren’t any guidelines on setting online time limits, although parents can tailor limits to their child’s level of maturity, so the younger the child, the shorter the time limit, Dr Ong suggests. 

Since kids are given to surfing aimlessly if they are not gaming, he adds that you should impose a two-hour limit if your child is using the computer for non-essential work, such as Internet surfing, online gaming and MSN chatting. Of course, while 20 to 30 minutes may seem right for a preschooler, allow more time if your school-going child needs to use the Internet for schoolwork. 

If junior spends too much time on the computer, this sedentary way of life is often a precursor of many lifestyle ailments like obesity and coronary arterial diseases. Other pitfalls of extended computer use include eye strain, along with ergonomic concerns, such as repetitive stress syndrome (wrist injuries).
So, help your child strike a good balance between online and offline activities, advises Associate Professor Angeline Khoo of the Psychological Studies Academic Group at the National Institute of Education (NIE). At the end of the day, the experts agree, moderation is key. To achieve a good balance, ensure that your kids get sufficient rest and encourage them to take up healthy activities, such as exercise. 

BUYER BEWARE
When used appropriately and safely, the Internet is a useful tool that parents can help their offspring mine from. Dr Ong notes that studies done overseas show that children with vigilant parents ? who always check the ratings of games before allowing them to play ? generally get into fewer fights and have better grades in school. 

It makes sense if parents test-drive games first to assess their suitability, this includes checking online games as well as ones that can be downloaded from the Internet. So, take an interest in the games your child plays and do some snooping beforehand, for example, by checking their ratings. For instance, are the restrictions due to its violent or sexual content, or are there other reasons? 

Taking it a step further, NIE’s Prof Khoo suggests that it is a good thing if parents to play and explore any new game together with their children. If you are unfamiliar with the game, get your kids to teach you.  By getting involved and playing together, parents will get first-hand experience of any potential dangers. 

SCREEN SAVIOURS
No one disputes the Internet’s positive aspects, especially since it is a powerhouse of information, especially for school projects. Dr Hong also notes that the Web is a good source of educational games and programs and an excellent platform to share resources and communicate with people from the world over. Poh adds that the World Wide Web can influence and inspire others in a positive way. 

Indeed, a child can pick up a lot of social skills interacting with others in an online environment, such as in an online game, Assoc Prof Khoo points out. In addition, parents who play with their kids can model correct behaviours, especially when others demonstrate aggressive or impatient behaviour. With proper guidance during games, kids can learn values like patience, empathy, as well as to tolerate different views.
 
Dr Ong has these parting words for worried parents, “When tapped wisely and responsibly, the child’s online experience can be positive and healthy.”

If you have any comments or practical suggestions, write to us at editor@family.sg 

- Mother & Baby
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